The Most Rational Trump Article I Can Write

I quite simply could not go on without writing how I felt about our political climate right now.  It feels historic. It feels as though I will look back one day and know this was the moment where everything in America changed.  Sure, it’s been a gradual change since Obama was elected, but America is markedly different in the last three years. And say what you will about this party keeping that one from getting anything done or this party being hypocritical or this party being un-American or this party blah blah. 

Just shut up with the partisan shit for ten minutes and read an unbiased take on all of it.  Because I PROMISE you I have done my absolutely damnedest to see this from all sides. In real life I’m as centrist as you can find, and in this article I’m going to lambaste both parties so fairly that both of them will need a hug afterwards.

The common denominator in this historic time – this time that feels like it’s the turning point of our once great country – is one man.  ONE freaking man. That’s the part I can’t get past. If Mike Pence was president right now, the left would be disgruntled, but it wouldn’t be I-hope-tonight-is-the-night-Trump-dies angry.  And if Mike Pence was president right now, the biggest pushes from the right would probably be abortion and their un-Constitutional desire to have Bible study after everyone was forced to stand for the National Anthem each morning in every private, for-profit charter school in the United States because they cancelled public education (sorry, that’s my one soap box; I’m a teacher.)

But it wouldn’t be like this.  Our country is falling apart because of ONE man.  Can you stop for a moment – even if you are his biggest supporter – and consider how terrifying that is?

Do you understand how insignificant we are?  There are nine BILLION people on the planet. We are so fragile we can literally die from a paper cut.  Because of what we take from the Earth and the damage we leave behind, a person’s death is actually GOOD for the planet.  When a person dies, the only ones truly affected are parents, children, siblings, and spouses. It doesn’t change the trajectory of the lives of cousins and aunts and coworkers and friends.  We are completely meaningless, insignificant, forgettable, and replaceable beings. 

So why in the hell is this man so important that he is destroying the civility of an entire nation and single-handedly creating a fog of hatred across the entire land?  And we may not all hate the same things, but if you care anything about politics in this country, I almost guarantee you that hate is infiltrating your heart far more than you wish it would. It is absolute insanity that ONE man is that important or influential. We should be terrified by this.

My View of the Right

From what I can gather, Trump supporters believe he is the greatest president to ever live.  That will forever be impossible because a man cannot be the greatest ever when he hates at least half the people he leads and would be reprimanded for rampant immaturity by third grade teachers, but this is their belief.  The reasons why are difficult for me to explain, but I’ll try my best to spell them out.  

They say they love him because he is not a politician and because he says what’s on his mind and because he doesn’t take any shit from other countries taking advantage of us anymore and because he hates illegal immigrants as much as they do and because he uncovered all the corruption in Washington (I have actually seen that one MULTIPLE times and it baffles me every time; I mean, we already knew it was full of corruption, right?)  I also think – and this is the mountainous cherry on top – that they absolutely LOVE the way he angers Democrats. Oh how they love it. They do not care if he is lying or gaslighting or deflecting or acting like a prepubescent bully. Those are easily explained away as, “That’s just Trump being Trump.” But the very transparent fact remains that they simply LOVE it when the Democrats get pissed off.

It is important to note at this point that we live in a FREE country and we are FREE to believe as we see fit. But because the people on the left have beliefs that don’t perfectly align with the right, each side loves it when the other gets pissed off. This is obviously seen much more at this point from the right side because of Mr. Trump leading the charge, but we are in a time right now when it doesn’t FEEL free to have beliefs that differ from the right. It feels as though any beliefs that differ in this FREE country should be thoroughly denounced as un-American, but there really isn’t a place in our Constitution where “American” is defined.

But because the left does not fit this unwritten definition of “American” that the right flings around the internet by way of memes, Presidential tweets, and Biblical teachings, you simply MUST be on the right to be a “real” American. And if these internet based requirements to be a “real” American anger the left, it’s an OH HAPPY DAY moment.   

Trump’s most ardent of supporters also believe he was sent by God to save the United States from…  What exactly? The arbitrary yet omnipresent devil? The First Amendment? Sharia Law? I gotta tell you, I’m one of those people that believes in God for no other reason than absolutely NOTHING in this world makes sense unless somebody is responsible, but I cannot wrap my head around what God needs to save so badly in my little world.  Especially by a man who I have quite honestly NEVER seen act Christian except for the time his speechwriters wrote that speech for the Christmas special when he “brought Christmas back to the White House.”  

But he HAS mocked a disabled man.  And he HAS bragged about grabbing women in the Hoohah.  And he HAS been accused of sexual assault by literally dozens of women.  And he HAS lied thousands of times to the people he was trusted to lead. These are in the New Trump Version of the Bible, I guess.

And more recently, he also said the Lord’s name in vain twice in Greenville, North Carolina at a rally.  Just a good old fashioned GD right after another one. It was fabulous if you’re a TRUE believer. And his Twitter account looks like he intends to hate everybody that disagrees with him, find a juvenile name for each of them, and make up lies about them to make them look worse than him. These, I presume, are in the Book of Donald. That’s Old Testament, right?

The Lord sent him to save America?  Really? Why don’t my eyes and ears work when you guys are seeing him act like a Christian?  Once again, I think it has more to do with the simple fact that you are blinded by Franklin Graham’s ridiculous declaration of this heaven-sent savior and because those words and your faithful leader piss off the Democrats DAILY.  You LOVE it.  

You’re letting ONE man control how you feel about people.  You’re letting ONE man control how you treat people. You’re letting ONE man decide what the Constitution means. You’re letting ONE man decide what Christianity means to you.  You’re letting ONE man give a pretty bad face to that religion, too.  And yet it seems from the sidelines that HE is the one you worship, not your savior.  How are you not terrified by that? Is it simply because you’ve pissed off the Democrats, and even your soul is for sale if you can maintain their anger?  Because that anger is far more important than them enjoying the freedom to have their own view of the world, isn’t it?

My View of the Left

Will you please, for God sakes, stop talking about impeachment and just beat his ass in 2020?  Trump has managed to rile you up so badly – and he’s caused the right to get so crazed with your anger – that the only thing you are capable of is doing the exact opposite of what the Republicans are doing and allowing this “opposite-ness” to lead you to believe impeachment is going to happen.  It’s not, and even if it did, do you really want the nation torn apart even more? There would be actual riots if he were impeached and removed from office. I’m not kidding.

One man has changed your entire party.  I used to be on your side, and I guess I saw it coming because I left ten years ago.  I don’t remember the specific reason why, but my memory has always told me I just couldn’t handle being tethered to either party when they are both full of such corrupt people that I wanted no part of such a commitment.

And now I’m glad I did.  What happened when Trump started his reign of hatred and immaturity and divisiveness?  You took your ball and you said, “Well, if he’s going to act like a baby, so are we.” And then when the right got cocky and started going more extreme with their right-wing views and legislative demands, you answered that by going so far left that every Republican in the world thinks you guys want full-blown socialism.  I know you don’t (except maybe Bernie,) and you know you don’t, but Trump told them you do, so that’s who they believe.

But you answered their extreme moves with your own extreme moves, and now you’re so extreme that the only person I want on that Democratic ballot is Biden and that’s only because he’s the most centrist and boring and I truly believe that’s what we need to bring some normalcy back to our very damaged and divided country.

Has it ever occurred to you that all you had to do from VERY early in Trump’s campaign was to ignore him?  Or kill him with kindness? These are things they teach in elementary school, and they have been for centuries.  Why? Because they work.  

But look at how you’ve screwed yourself (and all of us in the middle) for 2020.  You are completely and totally right to want the border crap cleaned up and get kids out of cages and all the humanitarian “fixes” that need to happen with asylum seekers and families who have been torn apart.  But did you have to champion causes such as illegal immigrants getting social security and free health care? I’m all for equality, but I pay $720 a month for my family to have health care, and it pisses me off to find out that an illegal immigrant is calling home bragging that they had an emergency appendectomy for free.  And then when they hang up, they wire $500 back home for granny’s meds.

I’m a high school math teacher, and I teach at a Title 1 school with an approximate 40% Hispanic population.  Some of them have flat out admitted they are undocumented, and they’re almost proud of it. Now I love my students to death, but they need to be working towards naturalization.  It’s just a no-brainer kind of issue. If we have laws, and if we are going to continue to be an appealing country to asylum seekers and those wanting a better life, we have to be better at following and upholding the law.  It’s that simple. I follow the law, they should, too. So when I hear that it is their RIGHT to get Social Security, I ask the same thing the Republicans are asking. Do criminals have rights?

And free college?  Universal health care?  Abortions at seven years post-delivery (that’s what the memes say, right)?  We haven’t balanced a federal budget in 18 years. How hard would it have been to beat Trump with a simple, “Let’s keep taxes low and get our spending under control and find our equality and freedom again.”  And I get it with the full term abortions. You’re just trying to make sure you get every base covered so nobody can sue a doctor for taking a dead baby at 38 weeks. But why cheer for it? That was the easiest meme ever made.  “They’re cheering and clapping for infanticide!! They’re all going to hell!!!!”

But because you were so pissed off at Trump, you decided to go way, way left just to piss HIM off.  And what have you done by doing that? You have made it almost impossible to beat him in 2020. Great job on that one.  All you had to do was “be the bigger person” and treat a narcissistic bully exactly the way we’ve been teaching kids to treat them for centuries.  But you sunk to his level, and now your only defense is to use his Tweets against him. That’s working out well so far, huh? I’m writing this on Saturday, July 27, 2019, and that man was OFF THE RAILS crazy today.  Just batshit Tweety crazy. And everybody on the left is saying exactly the same thing they’ve been saying for two and a half years.

“You can’t say that.  You’re racist. You’re such a bully.  You’re lying through your teeth. Everybody heard what Mueller said and you’re saying the complete opposite.  We’re going to impeach you. You’re going to prison.”

Blah blah blah blah blah.  Same things over and over and over again.  And what is the right saying while this is going on?

“High five, bitches, we got the Democrats triggered.”  Yep, they got you triggered. It’s their ultimate turn-on. It’s why they love Donald J Trump. He triggers you, and you let him.

My View From the Middle

This all makes me pretty sad actually.  Like there is a slight feeling of doom when I see these things unfolding.  Just today Trump destroyed an entire city by saying “No human beings would want to live there.”  The district is predominantly black, and he knew that. He said their city was a “disgusting, rat and rodent infested mess.”  How can ANY leader be that callous and immature? I just think much, much higher of the Office of President of the United States.  Even if your argument about politicians is that “they’re all crooked and the other party started it and Obama said this and Hillary did that and Mitch won’t let us do this and blah blah blah,” can’t the Office of President be the ONE office in the nation that we hold to the highest and most noble standard?

Trump also said today that Elijah Cummings, a Congressman from Baltimore, the city just referenced in the above Tweet, “does NOTHING for his very poor, very dangerous, and very badly run district.”  When all else fails, I guess, use hyperbole to get the Democrats triggered. It’s what the Trump fans love the most.

Trump also called Cummings a bully.  Because Trump is such a sweetie and not the least bit hypocritical.  He also said Cummings’ district is “considered the worst in the USA.”  Because truth does not matter. The only things that matter is that he destroys those who disagree with him and triggers the left in the process.  

He then accused SOMEBODY in Baltimore of embezzling federal money.  Because again, the truth does not matter. Just trigger the f**king Democrats.

He also called Robert Mueller – an extremely dedicated and decorated United States patriot who performed his job impeccably and exactly as instructed – inept and incompetent.  Because everybody who is perceived to be below him must be squashed because those below him are such easy targets. And what had Mueller just done two days prior, and done so with extremely cautious indifference because the last thing he was going to do was perjure himself?  He proved that Donald Trump committed impeachable offenses that could follow him out of office and land him in prison. Those are facts. You can’t deflect them or deny them or say it was Obama’s fault. They’re facts. What Trump said was exactly what his base wanted to hear. Why? Because truth doesn’t matter.  Triggering the Democrats is ALL that matters.

Lastly, President Trump also said (in all caps, of course,) “NO COLLUSION, NO OBSTRUCTION, TOTAL EXONERATION, DEMOCRAT WITCH HUNT!”  During the Mueller hearing, Mr. Mueller said the exact opposite of every single claim in this tweet. Trump says things like this daily that are obviously false to about 70% of the population because the only ones he needs to convince are the ones in his base.  They believe only him, because he has even led them to believe that all news is fake. They believe ONLY him. They believe EVERYTHING out of the mouth of ONE man. Why is that not terrifying to them?

I do not like my President.  Not even a little bit. I do not trust a single word that comes out of his mouth.  Even though I’m pretty doggone fiscally conservative, I would NEVER vote for him (I voted for neither person in 2016 because both of our options sucked.)  I’m completely and totally baffled for the first time in my life by some VERY intelligent people who cannot see what ONE man is doing to our country. He’s just not that important.  And he certainly hasn’t earned an ounce of respect. And the way he treats people who disagree with him makes him even less important and less respectable. He should be universally ignored, not revered.

I thought about something the other day that truly made me stop and think.  And I mean think HARD. Like think through every possible scenario to make sure I agreed with myself.  My son is three years old. What if he was eighteen, and what if Trump angered the world enough that we had no allies in a war he could literally start any day because of how unstable his decision-making is?  And what if they incorporated a draft because we lost all of our allies and had nobody to have our back?  

The part I thought long and hard about was that draft. And no matter the scenario, no matter the opponent, my decision was the same. I would do everything in my power to keep my son from that war.  Why? Because I do not trust my President. I love this country so much that I am very close to running for office to do my part to save it, but I would NOT let my son fight a war that Donald Trump started.

I would not trust a single word out of his mouth, I would not trust the reasons we went to war, and I would not trust any promises he made about our intentions, and that is heartbreaking to consider when one considers their own beloved country going to war. But I would not let my son die in vain going to war for an incompetent bully who would claim victory on Twitter even if another country successfully overtook us.

As for all of his claims of greatness, I could not give a rat’s ass how good our economy is right now.  I’m a teacher whose pay against inflation has actually gone DOWN since I started teaching seven years ago.  And the General Assembly and the State Treasurer are about to royally screw us with our health insurance because they’re Republican led and therefore required to worship Trump, so that means we’ll be earning even less next year.  How good do you think the economy is for me?

You know what I see? I see a President and Congress spending so much damn money – in an already flourishing economy, no less – that it BETTER be a good economy because we’ll be paying for it until the oceans dry up.  And my guess is that Trump will spend his way to a beautiful economy until he is out of office because he would be destroyed by a recession. Of course, if it happened he would just blame the Fed. It wouldn’t be his fault AT ALL.

I will never understand this period in our history, and I truly hope I am able to one day look back on it and say, “Man, we dodged a bullet on that one.”  I look forward to the day that I’m pretty confident I can have a civil conversation about politics with a stranger I might meet on the street, and during that conversation we will both respect the other’s opinions and beliefs.  I look forward to the day that I can listen to my president and feel good about my country because I know I’m listening to a man or woman who believes in every person in every state and in every high rise penthouse or rat-infested slum.

I look forward to the day that humanity is bigger than our differences, yet at the same time our differences inspire us and propel us.  I look forward to the day I read comments on an article and I don’t see grown adults calling each other idiot or brainless or stupid and getting physically aroused by angering our fellow man. I look forward to the day that every person in this country feels valued and important and respected and knows their president will not call them immature names or go on racist diatribes.  I feel like I’m about to break into an “I have a dream” speech, so maybe that’s enough.  

Although it feels like we need one right about now.

PS.  The hats in the intro pic?  Civil, Nice, Mature, Tolerant, Free, Dream